take time for yourself and don’t feel bad about it.

**wrote this post several months ago but never published it- oops**

I’m feeling nostalgic at the moment.  I asked my husband tonite if he minded that I prefer to spend parts of my birthday alone, shopping to my hearts content- and he said “nope”.  I like that he lets me be who I am.  I love that he knows it’s important for my sanity to have “me time” because we both know it’ll make me a better wife and mother.  And I really like that after I shopped half the day, he didn’t mind that I napped the other half.

If I could share advice to every new mother it would be this simple truth:  take time for yourself and don’t feel bad about it.  Stepping away from the kiddos doesn’t mean you love them less or that you’re a bad mom.  It doesn’t mean that you can’t handle it or that you’ve failed.  It means you’re human.  It means you’re normal.  It means you’re smart.  It means you’re in it for the long haul.

I think I might be a little more selfish than the average person.  I like plenty of aloneness.  I choose to grocery shop when I can go by myself.  I enjoy coffee dates without children- not that I’ve done that in awhile.  I like babysitters, even though we haven’t hired them much lately.  And mostly, I just never forget that I need to be alone sometimes.

I love my boys.  And I’m pretty sure that’s why I make time for myself.  I am a better mom because of it.

That’s all.

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2 responses to “take time for yourself and don’t feel bad about it.

  1. I hear you — I teach one class (1.5 hours every other day) at a local high school, and though it doesn’t really pay enough to make it worth the trouble, it is good for me to put on grown-up pants and go do something that doesn’t involve diapers. And I went back 4 weeks after Ellie was born, in part because it’s for college credit, so the sub isn’t qualified to teach it, and in part because it gives me a brief break.

    And I just called teaching “me time.” I need better hobbies.

  2. Sooooooo true! I’m so in it for the long haul 🙂 I love that phrase. Thank you.

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